Father Thomas Welbers' Homily	Jump back to Homily Index
Feast of the Holy Family, December 28, 2003 1 Samuel 1:20-22, 24-28 1 John 3:1-2. 21-24 Luke 2:41-52	Listen to Audio

The more often I read this story, which is unique in all of Scripture – it’s the only glimpse we have of Jesus’ childhood or adolescence; in fact, it’s his Bar Mitzvah, the moment of transition from childhood to adolescence, the threshold of adulthood – the more often I read this story, the more I simply cannot escape the fact that the only word to describe Jesus’ behavior is that he was acting like a brat. Any parent who has had a kid not tell them where they were going, stay away for an unreasonable length of time, and then say – all sweetly and innocently, and with a little accusatory tone in their voice – “Well, you should have known I’d be here doing this. I don’t know why you’re so upset!” Any parent who’s had this happen them, knows the only word to describe their kid is “bratty.”

We also know, all kids do this. I have my own memories of disappearing from my parents’ control, and severely upsetting them, and so do you. And you who are parents – and grandparents – have that experience from the other side as well! And you know as well as I do, although it seems blasphemous to say this, Jesus misbehaved here. That stuff about “my Father’s house,” even if true, which it was, was a pretty flimsy excuse for not at least checking in with Mary and Joseph about his intentions. After all, God the Father had entrusted him to their care – and he knew it! So what are we to make of this? Scripture is inspired by the Holy Spirit, and this story does have meaning – in fact I think it has several layers of meaning. So I’d like to explore at least one of those layers in a little more depth..

Well, first of all, we have to remember that it is a doctrine of our faith that Jesus was human like us in all things except sin. In some ways that may be reassuring to us because this kind of brattiness, whether in Jesus or in us or in our kids, is probably not sinful, even though it needs to be corrected. It’s a normal part of growing up, and while parents may be distressed and even angry about the independent behavior of their adolescent children, and they need to be firm in correcting it, they should not use it as an excuse to lay a guilt trip on their kids.

Secondly, the conclusion of this story shows that Jesus learned his lesson. Jesus returning to Nazareth with Mary and Joseph, and, it says, he “was obedient to them.” Jesus learned something here – and even as the Son of God, in his human nature, he had to learn the same way as we do. And you know how we learn – though trial and error, through pushing the envelope and getting our hand slapped, through success and failure. That’s how Jesus had to learn too, if we accept the teaching of the Church that he was truly human. He had to learn obedience.

This story of Jesus staying behind and being found in the Temple has rightly been seen as an indication that Jesus’ mission as the Son of God incarnate in human flesh was beyond his family and even beyond human limitations. But that in itself is not the whole picture. He also learned that, at that moment, the will of his heavenly Father was that he be obedient to the family in which he had been placed. And, I think in the journey back home to Nazareth, he was chastened and humbled – a difficult and painful experience for him. This is important because the Letter to the Hebrews states so clearly and eloquently that Jesus, “Son though he was, learned obedience from what he suffered; and when he was made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him.” [See Hebrews 5:8-9.] In other words, our very salvation, that is, any hope for life beyond the limitations and pains and fleeting pleasures of this present world, depended on his learning obedience.

And so for us, on this Feast of the Holy Family, we have the experience even of Jesus, Mary and Joseph, assuring us of what we already know – growing up isn’t easy, neither for parent nor for child. But the challenges of growing up are worth the effort, whether in discipline or in obedience, because growing in “wisdom, age, and grace” fulfills God’s designs for us in this life, and more importantly, in the life to come.

© Thomas Welbers 2003